Cardboard leaders.
Look, if you’re a Christian, which I am, sooner or later it comes down to the brute fact that you’re a Christian because you believe that’s the only way to salvation.
Christians do lots of wonderful things – bake sales, Christmas pageants, The Crusades – but if Jesus isn’t risen from the dead for the salvation of mankind then we are, as St. Paul noted, of all men the most to be pitied, for our religion is the most worthless.
There’s only one essential message we Christians have to bring to the world: Repent and be saved. Apart from that there is no reason for Christianity at all. None, nada, zip, zilch. Apart from the fact of the risen Christ’s atonement for sin we’re nothing but a social ethics club.
So how in God’s name can so-called Christian leaders concern themselves with such trivia as what kind of cars their parishioners drive when there’s a world out there going to hell for lack of the Christian message? Exhibit A:
DETROIT (AP) - A group of religious leaders came to the Motor City on Wednesday with a proposition for U.S. automakers: Start producing vehicles that are kinder to God’s creation, and we will urge the faithful to buy them.
If my minister ever said from the pulpit “As Christians, I think we all should be driving Brand X car,” I would stand up and walk out and never go back.
The delegation, which included representatives from a variety of Jewish and Christian organizations, met with executives and top officials at Ford Motor Co., General Motors Corp. and the United Auto Workers.
Evidently top officials at Ford Motor Co., General Motors Corp. and the UAW had their golf date rained out.
Earlier, the group introduced a “What Would Jesus Drive?” television advertising campaign, sponsored by the Pennsylvania-based Evangelical Environmental Network.
No doubt you’ve been holding off on purchasing a car to see what the group recommends. (Jews concern themselves with what sort of car Jesus would drive?) Besides, as my former interim pastor said, “I still don’t understand how anyone could purport to know what kind of car Jesus would drive. Wasn’t he accused of being a glutton and connoisseur of fine wine? Given that, he probably would be accused today of driving a way too big SUV.”
The ad, to begin airing in limited markets next month, says too many vehicles are polluting, then asks: “So if we love our neighbor and we cherish God’s creation, maybe we should ask, ‘What would Jesus drive?’”
Answer: Nobody alive has any clue. Personally, my friend said, I think Jesus would probably be driving a 25 year old VW Beetle, which, with its worn piston rings and faulty carb, would be getting less mpg than a 2003 Lincoln Mountaineer, not to mention all the hydrocarbons it would be belching into the atmosphere.
Poor Jesus never fares well at the hands of the religious hierarchy of the day – cf. the Pharisees. This “What Would Jesus Drive?” onanism brings to mind Max von Sydow’s character’s pronouncement in Woody Allen’s Hannah And Her Sisters: “If Jesus came back today and saw what was being done in his name, he would never stop throwing up.”
Representatives of GM and Ford said they looked forward to a dialogue with the Interfaith Climate and Energy Campaign’s leaders to explain advances and challenges in the effort to improve vehicle fuel efficiency.
And to move some iron.
The religious groups – which include the Korean Presbyterians, the United Synagogue of Conservative Judaism, [and, gulp, my own] the Mennonite Church – are promoting hybrid and fuel-cell vehicles, as well as other fuel-saving technologies, framing their arguments in both moral and economic terms.
Trying to serve God by invoking mammon. It’s been tried before. Hasn’t worked. Besides, Mennonites weighing in on how cars should be made has all the resonance of Orthodox Jews criticizing the salt content of Smithfield hams.
“If you in the American auto industry manufacture and market more clean cars, we in the American religious community will not only tell our people about it, but we’ll have prepared them to embrace such a change,” said David Saperstein, director of the Religious Action Center of Reform Judaism in Washington.
David who? American religious community? Some Jew nobody’s ever heard of is speaking on my behalf as a member of the American religious community? Boy if it’s that easy here goes: Sam Adams Brewery, I’m speaking to you on behalf of the American football-watching community when I say if you lower the price of a six-pack to $1.99 I will not only tell my fellow football watchers, but I’ll prepare them to embrace such a change.
As many as 100,000 congregations and synagogues nationwide have been contacted about the cause, and more notifications by letter and e-mail are planned, said the Rev. Bob Edgar, general secretary of the New York-based National Council of Churches of Christ USA.
Is this where my offering is going, to support such time-wasting crap as this? Hey, do we let GM tell us how to preach sermons? Of the 100 things Jesus could possibly want Christians to be occupying their precious time and energy on Earth with I’d think quibbling about miles per gallon would be about 374th.
Conservation is something non-Christians do as well or better than Christians per se. We do not need Christians in the forefront of the Better Gas Mileage crusade when they could be at the front of the Spread The Christian Message crusade. There is only one reason for the existence of the Christian church at all: To spread the Christian message of salvation through Jesus Christ. Everything else is window dressing, and I’m sick to death of cardboard leaders claiming to speak for me on the economy, the war with Iraq, school vouchers and now gas mileage.
Does the Christian poseur clergy really wonder why their churches are emptying like a 500-pound skunk farted in the middle pew? They’re spending 98% of their time on things the secular world does a far better job at, and they’re studiously ignoring the only raison d’etre for Christians at all.
If they’d really rather be social activists more power to them, quit the ministry and go off an be social activists and let somebody preach who’s interested in expounding the Word of God to the congregation instead of repeating half-baked leftist political slogans.